Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA

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(561): View more from Florida

My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.

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(254): View more from Texas

The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium

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(903): View more from Texas

EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT

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(269): View more from Michigan

No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.

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(239): View more from Florida

i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.

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(315): View more from New York

she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore

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(716): View more from New York

I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.

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