can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
