She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
