So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
