Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
