yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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