She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
