i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize