I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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