I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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