i already hear my dad disowning me
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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