They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize