Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
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