what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Randomize
