sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Randomize