pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Randomize
