Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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