WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
