i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
