We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
