It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
