I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
