I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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