What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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