Rock
Scissors
Fuck
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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