what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
