Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
