thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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