3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
