they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
