I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
