I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Randomize
