Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
