He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
