yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
