She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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