I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
