I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
sarcasm needs its own font
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Houston, we have a squirter
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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