Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
