everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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