I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Randomize
