He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
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