I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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