There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
