i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Randomize
