Who wears a wallet chain?!
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Randomize
