the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
