his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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