Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
