Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
