i think my tv is drunk
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
