More tranny stories later!
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
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